My kids are driving me crazy. Hardly an original thought, I know, but that is the plain truth. I feel like I am being ratcheted up, slowly but surely, to Mommy Dearest-like status.
I don't like that. I don't like feeling that, in acting like a crazy lady, I've given up control. To squirrel-y, monkey boys.
So, what to do? Stop. Start fresh. Thank the Lord for new days, new hours, new minutes. I realize I just have to make a very conscious effort, with each new day, to be patient, loving, kind, slow to anger... I need to speak softer (no big stick, though- the little monkeys would probably take it and wack me with it). Sometimes, I need to not speak at all. I need to pray about it more- every time I feel my blood pressure rise (and I have the blood pressure of a dead person, go figure). And, sadly, I need to stop playing around with my kids.
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I started putting the above into practice Monday morning (after nearly packing my bags and moving out Sunday night). Speaking softly, literally and figuratively, is a neat trick in the world of parenting. For one thing, it shuts the wee tyrants up. They can tell I'm talking but they can't hear what I'm saying so- quiet. Hard to do though when every fiber of my being wants to get LOUD. But the funny thing about getting loud is that I feel pretty lousy after the fact.
And, not speaking at all. Who knew! A knowing look goes a long way with a kid, especially when they are fully aware that they are doing or saying something they shouldn't. Plus, the anticipation of your saying something seems to neutralize the situation. Hee, hee, hee.
Praying. It helps. He helps. And, it gives you a moment, like counting to ten, but it's more productive. Amen.
And finally, not playing around with my kids. I don't mean playing with them. I (my husband, too) need to quit playing around with them because that is giving them the impression that we are all equals. We aren't and none of us should be treating the others as if we are. I have to be the mature one in all situations concerning my boys. It's about consistency more than anything else. If I laugh with Nathanael about something that Asher should not be doing, for example, but get upset with Nathanael for laughing at Asher the next time it happens, how is that fair to any of us? Well, it's not and it's on me to change this.
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Yesterday was a fresh new day! New behaviors and attitudes were exhibiting themselves all over the place! Until after dinner. We'll call it the witching hour. Actually, it wasn't that bad but I could tell the spell was beginning to fade. Thank heavens for early bed times!
Today! Another fresh new day! Huh? Well, another day at least. The Lord and I have had several conversations so far (and It's only 1:15!). I haven't gone off the deep end but I have noticed a bit more volume about me. Thank heavens for nap time!!!
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I guess I have to stop thinking that there is a quick fix in this parenting dilemma. I have to remember to be conscious of my role as mother. A role I can never set aside, not even for the merest of moments, if I am to be successful. But, I am determined! I love being a mom. I love being a mom to boys. I love my boys.
...But the greatest of these is love. :)
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